(NaturalNews) Have you heard the news? Froot Loops are a "Smart Choice" for children's health (even though they're made with 40% sugar), and Cocoa Krispies can boost your immunity! (
http://www.naturalnews.com/027386_Kelloggs_food_cocoa.html)
But there's more to this story. NaturalNews contacted employees of Kellogg's, General Mills and Post to find out what future cereal health claims they might be floating. And guess what? They sent us actual box mockups that depict the new, upcoming health claims you'll soon be seeing on grocery store shelves! (Not really... this article is a parody, but I figured you already knew that...)
Froot Loops now
cures cancer! It must be all the different
colors. They always say eat a variety of different colors of food to stay
healthy, and Froot Loops provides them all!
Cap'n Crunch now gives you washboard abs. Get it? Crunches...
Cheerios solves chronic stress! (It also helps with
sleep disorders by boring you to sleep...)
Frosted Flakes for
breakfast: Rise and shine!
It's more about the bunches than the
honey, believe me...
Guys will buy anything if it will snare some babes...
There's almost no honey in Honey Smacks, by the way. The first 3 ingredients are
sugar, wheat and corn syrup...
Hurry, somebody tell Congress!
About these cereal boxes
I couldn't help creating these after reading about the Cocoa Krispies "
immunity" claim. I wondered: What sort of claims would cereal companies try next? From there, it just morphed into a bizarre parody of all our favorite
childhood cereals. Feel free to share this article (and the pictures), and please credit
NaturalNews with a link to this article. Thank you!
I don't know about you, but I grew up
eating all this crap, which might be one of the reasons why I was nearly diabetic by age 30. But after ditching processed sugar, sodas, cow's milk and most factory foods, I was able to reverse that condition and stay healthy to this day. (Drinking lots of raw vegetable and
fruit juices also made a huge difference.)
Frankly, I'm surprised that I even survived my childhood, considering all the sugary cereals and MSG-laced snack chips I ate on a regular basis. Luckily, though, I lived to tell this story -- and I hope your
kids do, too. For God's sake don't let your kids eat sugary breakfast cereals. Feed 'em Kashi or granola, and watch the sugar content in those, too. Better yet, give them some fresh
fruit juice (raw, living juice) with some home-made whole-grain bread or something. They may resist it at first, but twenty years later, they'll
thank you for it.
Plus, you won't have to pay their hospital bills for diabetes treatments.
By the way, the
images in this story are pure parody. Cereal makers aren't actually planning on making these ridiculous claims...
...or are they?
About the author: Mike Adams is an award-winning journalist and holistic nutritionist with a passion for teaching people how to improve their health He is a prolific writer and has published thousands of articles, interviews, reports and consumer guides, impacting the lives of millions of readers around the world who are experiencing phenomenal health benefits from reading his articles. Adams is an honest, independent journalist and accepts no money or commissions on the third-party products he writes about or the companies he promotes. In 2010, Adams co-founded NaturalNews.TV, a natural health video sharing site that has now grown in popularity. He also launched an online retailer of environmentally-friendly products (BetterLifeGoods.com) and uses a portion of its profits to help fund non-profit endeavors. He's also a veteran of the software technology industry, having founded a personalized mass email software product used to deliver email newsletters to subscribers. Adams is currently the executive director of the Consumer Wellness Center, a 501(c)3 non-profit, and regularly pursues cycling, nature photography, Capoeira and Pilates. Known by his callsign, the 'Health Ranger,' Adams posts his missions statements, health statistics and health photos at www.HealthRanger.org
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Tuesday, November 03, 2009
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