Originally published September 22 2013
10 steps to overcoming preprogrammed guilt
by Mike Bundrant
(NaturalNews) Although guilt can be paralyzing, it is does not necessarily reflect reality.
Guilt can be induced based on how we were raised - what our parents taught and demonstrated about right and wrong.
Teachers, religion, friends and media messages can also play a pivotal role in the formation of lifelong guilt.
In other words, much of guilt is socially wired into us as we pass through childhood and can leave its mark for the rest of our lives.
We can feel guilt even when we haven't done anything wrong, yet we let it influence our decisions. This can interfere when we are deciding what is best for our lives and when something people close to us don't want.
This is when guilt becomes a form of self-sabotage. It prevents us from doing what we want to do even when what we want is appropriate.
Some people feel guilty just for being happy or having fun, as if they were violating some long forgotten contract.
When this happens, Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townshend, in their book, Boundaries, talk about 10 steps to take to get over this unnecessary feeling.
1. Own the guilt - recognize that it's there and within you.
2. Evaluate where the guilt is coming from and why it is there.
3. Get into your support system - know that you are doing what's best for yourself.
4. Become aware of any anger (in case it creeps up on you in the process).
5. Forgive the person who is causing the guilt.
6. Set boundaries for yourself and get used to your supportive sub-conscience.
7. Learn and read more self-motivating information to help guide you.
8. Don't let the guilt be your master - disobey that parental sub-conscious.
9. Stay with your support system and surround yourself with people who love you.
10. Don't let the guilt hold you back. You're allowed to feel it, because it will be there. But it can be comforted and eventually, it will go away.
Follow these steps and you will be on the path that you have chosen. With this, you can make your life whatever you want it to be.
If this type of guilt is a chronic issue for you, there may be a psychological attachment in play.
Attachments are negativity magnets branded into our psyche through repeated patterns of reinforcement during a time when we had no choice but to accept.
In an unfortunate twist of fate, we end up attracting more and more of the negativity - even though we're sick of it - because that is what has become familiar.
If you have come to call guilt home, learn how psychological attachments create self-sabotage by watching this free video.
Thanks to Jen Bundrant for her help writing this article. If you like this article, like my Facebook Page to keep up with all my writing.
About the author:
Watch the free video The AHA! Process: An End to Self-Sabotage and discover the lost keys to personal transformation and emotional well-being that have been suppressed by mainstream mental health for decades.
The information in this video has been called the missing link in mental health and personal development. In a world full of shallow, quick-fix techniques, second rate psychology and pharmaceutical takeovers, real solutions have become nearly impossible to find. Click here to watch the presentation that will turn your world upside down.
Mike Bundrant is co-founder of the iNLP Center and host of Mental Health Exposed, a Natural News Radio program.
Follow Mike on Facebook for daily personal development tips.
Watch the free video The AHA! Process: An End to Self-Sabotage and discover the lost keys to personal transformation and emotional well-being that have been suppressed by mainstream mental health for decades.
The information in this video has been called the missing link in mental health and personal development. In a world full of shallow, quick-fix techniques, second rate psychology and pharmaceutical takeovers, real solutions have become nearly impossible to find. Click here to watch the presentation that will turn your world upside down.
Mike Bundrant is co-founder of the iNLP Center and host of Mental Health Exposed, a Natural News Radio program.
Follow Mike on Facebook for daily personal development tips.
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