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Censored CDC Ebola document restored by Natural News; urges Americans "do not lick doorknobs" (satire)

Ebola censorship

(NaturalNews) We've found the lost PDF document that was scrubbed by the CDC! As you may know, the CDC posted a document earlier this week admitting that Ebola can spread through aerosolized droplets and can contaminate surfaces at a distance.

Less than 24 hours after Natural News called out the CDC for admitting to lying to the American public about Ebola in previous months, the CDC scrubbed the document, censoring itself and engaging in Orwellian revisionist history while irresponsibly confusing the American public with contradictory messages about Ebola transmission.

Thank our lucky stars that I was fishing for a loose grape that slipped out of my fingers and fell into the sofa cushions, and lo and behold, I found the original CDC document they scrubbed!

That document, entitled, "What does the CDC want you to believe about Ebola today?" is now posted on Natural News servers to make sure it never gets lost again.

Click here to read it now and learn amazing advice from the CDC such as:

• Why Ebola is only airborne on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.

• Why you can't catch Ebola by touching yourself. Even if you touch yourself a lot.

• How the CDC exploited college interns to test what happens if you lick contaminated doorknobs.

• Details on the CDC's new "FU" hand washing protocols that eliminate all viruses from your middle finger.

... and much more!

Here's a sample from the new document:

Here's the URL of the full PDF (parody) document to see for yourself:

If you seriously want to see the original document the CDC scrubbed, it's actually found at this link.

This article is a parody, obviously. We would never make fun of Ebola patients and their horrible suffering; we use satire to draw attention to the outrageous incompetence of the CDC which has become a danger to us all and desperately needs new leadership. Our goal is to shame the CDC into telling the truth and supporting sensible measures to halt the spread of Ebola and protect lives (quarantines, border security, flight restrictions).

Learn the truth about Ebola at www.BioDefense.com

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About the author:Mike Adams (aka the "Health Ranger") is a best selling author (#1 best selling science book on Amazon.com) and a globally recognized scientific researcher in clean foods. He serves as the founding editor of NaturalNews.com and the lab science director of an internationally accredited (ISO 17025) analytical laboratory known as CWC Labs. There, he was awarded a Certificate of Excellence for achieving extremely high accuracy in the analysis of toxic elements in unknown water samples using ICP-MS instrumentation. Adams is also highly proficient in running liquid chromatography, ion chromatography and mass spectrometry time-of-flight analytical instrumentation.

Adams is a person of color whose ancestors include Africans and Native American Indians. He's also of Native American heritage, which he credits as inspiring his "Health Ranger" passion for protecting life and nature against the destruction caused by chemicals, heavy metals and other forms of pollution.

Adams is the founder and publisher of the open source science journal Natural Science Journal, the author of numerous peer-reviewed science papers published by the journal, and the author of the world's first book that published ICP-MS heavy metals analysis results for foods, dietary supplements, pet food, spices and fast food. The book is entitled Food Forensics and is published by BenBella Books.

In his laboratory research, Adams has made numerous food safety breakthroughs such as revealing rice protein products imported from Asia to be contaminated with toxic heavy metals like lead, cadmium and tungsten. Adams was the first food science researcher to document high levels of tungsten in superfoods. He also discovered over 11 ppm lead in imported mangosteen powder, and led an industry-wide voluntary agreement to limit heavy metals in rice protein products.

In addition to his lab work, Adams is also the (non-paid) executive director of the non-profit Consumer Wellness Center (CWC), an organization that redirects 100% of its donations receipts to grant programs that teach children and women how to grow their own food or vastly improve their nutrition. Through the non-profit CWC, Adams also launched Nutrition Rescue, a program that donates essential vitamins to people in need. Click here to see some of the CWC success stories.

With a background in science and software technology, Adams is the original founder of the email newsletter technology company known as Arial Software. Using his technical experience combined with his love for natural health, Adams developed and deployed the content management system currently driving NaturalNews.com. He also engineered the high-level statistical algorithms that power SCIENCE.naturalnews.com, a massive research resource featuring over 10 million scientific studies.

Adams is well known for his incredibly popular consumer activism video blowing the lid on fake blueberries used throughout the food supply. He has also exposed "strange fibers" found in Chicken McNuggets, fake academic credentials of so-called health "gurus," dangerous "detox" products imported as battery acid and sold for oral consumption, fake acai berry scams, the California raw milk raids, the vaccine research fraud revealed by industry whistleblowers and many other topics.

Adams has also helped defend the rights of home gardeners and protect the medical freedom rights of parents. Adams is widely recognized to have made a remarkable global impact on issues like GMOs, vaccines, nutrition therapies, human consciousness.

In addition to his activism, Adams is an accomplished musician who has released over a dozen popular songs covering a variety of activism topics.

Click here to read a more detailed bio on Mike Adams, the Health Ranger, at HealthRanger.com.

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