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Comments by Mike Adams, the Health RangerThe Greys have been running around the galaxy claiming all the water planets as their own, but when they got to Earth, it was too late: the water had already been polluted beyond all safety levels. This strategy, spearheaded by President George W. Bush of the United States, has been secretly named the "Poison Earth" defense against alien invasion. And it works! The idea is simple: Pollute planet Earth to the point where nobody else wants it. The aliens, of course, didn't want this to happen. That's why they gave us free energy technology several decades ago. But the U.S. government buried the technology and decided to run the world on oil and coal, thereby maximizing the pollution defensive shield. Part of that plan involves wiping out most animal species on the planet, too, out of fear that the aliens may have some sort of animal mind control technology that could turn all the animals against us. Imagine millions of enslaved cows in Greeley, Colorado, suddenly stampeding their way to Washington and taking over the White House. (The average IQ in Washington would actually go UP...) The next time you see a coal-fired power plant spewing pollution into the air, breathe a sigh of relief (if you can breathe at all) and thank President Bush for saving us against the alien threat. The United States deserves all the credit here, of course, for producing and deploying such weapons of mass pollution against the aliens. If you recall, it's the same strategy that Saddam Hussein used in the first Gulf War (part 1, before the sequel came out) by igniting all his oil rigs and threatening to burn up half the world's oil supply all at once. That was actually a defense against an alien scout team dressed up to look like American soldiers. Thank goodness the pollution strategy has worked! If it wasn't for all the pollution, we'd all be taking a ride to the Zorg galaxy in the mother ship right now. So give Bush the credit he's due here. Thanks to his efforts to override environmental protection regulations, minimize clean energy initiatives and encourage ongoing addiction to dirty combustion engines and coal-fired power plants, we actually have a planet left to call our own! It's all ours... every last polluted square inch of it! And to all you naysayers who insist there are no aliens and that President Bush is just an idiot politician who favors Big Business over environmental protection, I remind you about the alien threat. Bush's visionary leadership in accelerating the pollution of planet Earth represents a decisive, tactical victory over a very real threat -- even MORE real than the threat of terrorists! Get articles like this delivered to you FREE in our popular email newsletter Related CounterThink Cartoons:
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