Originally published June 29 2005
Seniors better at resolving conflicts
by Mike Adams, the Health Ranger, NaturalNews Editor
Despite the urban myth of "grumpy old men," recent studies suggest that the elderly of both sexes solve interpersonal conflicts better and are more likely to avoid conflict.
Grumpy old men and women may not be so grumpy after all.
Two new studies report that older people are better at getting along with others than younger people are and are much more content in their interpersonal relationships.
Even after controlling for factors such as sex and health, they found that the adults older than 80 were more likely to avoid conflict by waiting until things improved, while the younger people more often chose to leave in anger or engage in yelling and name-calling.
The second study, published in the June issue of Psychology and Aging, involved more than 1,000 people ages 25 to 74 who completed eight successive days of phone interviews, a technique that the authors believe produces more reliable recollections.
"Although people often think of older adults as ornery, they're actually nicer when they have problems in their relationships," said Dr. Kira S. Birditt, a research fellow at the University of Michigan and lead author of the studies.
It is widely believed that men and women often respond differently to interpersonal stress -- men by withdrawing and women by insisting on a solution.
But the two studies found no such variation between the sexes.
Moreover, Birditt pointed out, older adults of both sexes appeared to be better at handling conflict not only with family but with co-workers, neighbors and acquaintances.
"The type of relationship didn't matter," she said.
"Older people are just better at it."
And while confronting issues openly is often viewed as the best way to handle interpersonal problems, older adults often avoid this approach.
"It may be that avoiding problems is good for relationships," Birditt said.
"Particularly if it's a personality issue, something unlikely to change, it may be helpful to just ignore it."
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