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NetFlix DVD broken? Don't go to pieces... (satire) Mike Adams, the Health Ranger See article keywords and concepts

REPPED: netflix is the best service in the world for renting an unlimited number of cracked, scratched and otherwise unplayable DVDs. Through my netflix membership, I have been able to rent a shattered version of Oceans Eleven, a scratched-beyond-belief edition of The Bridges of Madison County, and a rare, limited copy of Citizen Kane that looked like it had gone through the San Francisco municipal recycling station (and still managed to make it out in the basic shape of a DVD disc).

And if, by chance, you receive a DVD from netflix that isn't already damaged, simply ask your mail carrier to FOLD all your mail, no matter how difficult that may seem, so that it fits into your tiny, overstuffed mailbox full of useless coupons for toxic laundry detergents and cancer-causing body care products. Folded DVDs, by the way, do not play very well. Unless, of course, it's a DVD of Ben Affleck's failed movie Gigli, in which case the playable and damaged versions of the DVD look exactly the same on screen. Seriously, this is all just a humorous exaggeration.

I wouldn't be surprised if Netflix's opinion of the U.S. Postal Service has been shattered (along with a couple million DVDs).

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ABOUT THE CREATOR OF NATURALPEDIA: Mike Adams, the creator of this NaturalNews Naturalpedia, is the editor of NaturalNews.com, the internet's top natural health news site, creator of the Honest Food Guide (www.HonestFoodGuide.org), a free downloadable consumer food guide based on natural health principles, author of Grocery Warning, The 7 Laws of Nutrition, Natural Health Solutions, and many other books available at www.TruthPublishing.com, creator of the earth-friendly EcoLEDs company (www.EcoLEDs.com) that manufactures energy-efficient LED lighting products, founder of Arial Software (www.ArialSoftware.com), a permission e-mail technology company, creator of the CounterThink Cartoon series (www.NaturalNews.com/index-cartoons.html) and author of over 1,500 articles, interviews, special reports and reference guides available at www.NaturalNews.com. Adams' personal philosophy and health statistics are available at www.HealthRanger.org.