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Strike a pose! BodyWorlds exhibit features human bodies preserved with industrial food chemicals (satire)

By Mike Adams, May 11 2007
(Warning: Contains graphic descriptions of human anatomy.) This past weekend, I worked up the courage to visit the Body Worlds exhibit in a local science museum. This is where they take the bodies of dead volunteers (who volunteered before they died, obviously), strip off their skin and body fat, then prop them up into dynamic poses where they are plasticized through a rather technical chemical process involving aspartame, sodium nitrite and yeast extract. Think Weekend at Bernie's, without the skin...

NetFlix DVD broken? Don't go to pieces... (satire)

By Mike Adams, May 11 2007
NetFlix is the best service in the world for renting an unlimited number of cracked, scratched and otherwise unplayable DVDs. Through my NetFlix membership, I have been able to rent a shattered version of Oceans Eleven, a scratched-beyond-belief edition of The Bridges of Madison County, and a rare, limited copy of Citizen Kane that looked like it had gone through the San Francisco municipal recycling station (and still managed to make it out in the basic shape of a DVD disc). The NetFlix website...

Movie review: Idiocracy starring Luke Wilson, directed by Mike Judge

By Mike Adams, February 5 2007
Every once in a while, a really smart movie comes along that shows you just how stupid modern society is by shoving it in your face. "Idiocracy" is precisely such a film. Filled with purposeful profanity (it actually drives the storyline) and brilliant parody, Idiocracy manages to cough up nearly 90 minutes of hilarious commentary on just how stupid modern society has become today. The storyline is simple: A career military desk jockey of average intelligence is cocooned in an experimental hibernation...

The idiot's guide to pronouncing "nuclear" and other difficult words (satire)

By Mike Adams, January 19 2007
In late October, 2006, Sen. John Kerry put himself in hot water with a joke that implied U.S. troops were, shall we say, less than "A" students. Republicans convulsed in an uproar, claiming that the troops are not only smart enough to win the war in Iraq, but their Commander In Chief is also so smart that someday he hopes to learn how to pronounce the word, "Nuclear." For the less gifted among us, please note that the word "Nuclear" is not pronounced "New-Cue-Ler." If you didn't know that, then...

What's on your mind for dinner, cow brains?

By Mike Adams, January 14 2007
First, a warning: This article may be considered extremely gross or nauseating by some readers. It's about where red meat actually comes from and the mental distortions maintained by people who eat large quantities of animal products. So, a courtesy warning: If you're easily sickened by talk of meat processing, I recommend you stop reading this article right now and don't read another word. I especially recommend that you skip the second half, which contains very graphic (but true) language about...

Santa beats diabetes with nutrition and exercise just in time for Christmas

By Mike Adams, December 25 2006
Following weeks of nutritional therapy and exercise, Santa Claus today declared himself free of type-2 diabetes and produced lab test results showing a fasting glucose level of 96 mg/dL – well below the diabetes definition of 126mg/dL. Through the month of December, Santa Claus has been working with a team of top nutritional advisors to reverse his diabetes. Thanks to his determined efforts to alter his diet and commit to regular exercise, Santa succeeded in overcoming the disease and is readying...

The top 10 uses for Christmas fruitcakes (satire)

By Mike Adams, December 22 2006
For as long as I can remember, the Christmas fruitcake has been a terrific source of holiday humor. I've never actually eaten a fruitcake, but I've seen lots of them, including one that I'm pretty sure was made with gummy bears. It's not just the name that's hilarious ("Fruit" and "Cake" don't belong in the same food item), but the physical appearance, too, which looks something like the injection molding for some kind of crude landmine. Receiving a fruitcake for Christmas may be the ultimate...

Santa Claus boosts exercise habit to beat type-2 diabetes before Christmas

By Mike Adams, December 15 2006
Earlier this month, Santa Claus was diagnosed with type-2 diabetes. By working with a team of top nutritionists, he has already improved his diet by eliminating foods and beverages that promote diabetes (like sodas, sugary cookies and white bread) while focusing on eating the foods that prevent diabetes and regulate healthy blood sugar metabolism: fresh produce, raw nuts, whole grains, healthy plant-based fats and targeted nutritional supplements that boost insulin sensitivity. (See part one of this...

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